VALENTINE, SHMALENTINE!
Are you cringing with the approaching celebration of Valentine's Day? You know, that day that makes many hearts knot up rather than cheer up. Billions of dollars ($13,290,000,000 in 2016) is spent worldwide but most of the spending is done in the US. We love a reason to romance, it seems.
Over the years I've known many couples who choose to NOT spend and celebrate Valentines Day in the traditional fashion, but rather show love in a personal way that requires some thought and planning. Perhaps one partner rising before the other to be sure the coffee is brewing nice and early. A handwritten note of what makes your loved one special in your eyes, or celebrating with your favorite burgers as a splurge for the week. There may not be a lot of glamour with those options, but they are options that could make a memory to last a lifetime.
As your family is facing a day of unwanted turmoil in the midst of crisis, how can you show love, especially for yourself? The Codependent, Enabler or Caregiver is often passed over on days like this. It's a lonely day of feeling unloved, uncelebrated or more simply, unnoticed.
What choices do we have? I hope you're still not hibernating through your chaos. I hope you've found a support group or recovery meeting to call home and a group that you can do some fun things with, too. We often get into groups and do nothing but hone in on all of our problems and worries. There's no help or healing in those types of groups. Find people that know how to celebrate each day despite the choices others are making and who urge you on to a brighter future for you.
Learn to appreciate that you are a child of the Creator who longs to see you step into His plan for you. That plan wasn't to be torturous or sad. So, what to do?
Take a child to a movie or take yourself! There are plenty of good movies to choose from and they aren't all romantic comedies if that's your stumbling block. Here are a few other suggestions:
Remember, the 3C's. You didn't Cause it, you can't Control it, you can't Cure it.
Find your joy today!
Oh, and these are for you =)
Over the years I've known many couples who choose to NOT spend and celebrate Valentines Day in the traditional fashion, but rather show love in a personal way that requires some thought and planning. Perhaps one partner rising before the other to be sure the coffee is brewing nice and early. A handwritten note of what makes your loved one special in your eyes, or celebrating with your favorite burgers as a splurge for the week. There may not be a lot of glamour with those options, but they are options that could make a memory to last a lifetime.
As your family is facing a day of unwanted turmoil in the midst of crisis, how can you show love, especially for yourself? The Codependent, Enabler or Caregiver is often passed over on days like this. It's a lonely day of feeling unloved, uncelebrated or more simply, unnoticed.
What choices do we have? I hope you're still not hibernating through your chaos. I hope you've found a support group or recovery meeting to call home and a group that you can do some fun things with, too. We often get into groups and do nothing but hone in on all of our problems and worries. There's no help or healing in those types of groups. Find people that know how to celebrate each day despite the choices others are making and who urge you on to a brighter future for you.
Learn to appreciate that you are a child of the Creator who longs to see you step into His plan for you. That plan wasn't to be torturous or sad. So, what to do?
Take a child to a movie or take yourself! There are plenty of good movies to choose from and they aren't all romantic comedies if that's your stumbling block. Here are a few other suggestions:
- Save your pennies through the year and splurge on a little something for yourself if you need to feel the extra love on Valentines day.
- Go to the salon, or get a pedicure or look for a sweet bracelet that means something to you. Too much money? Buy a new color of nail polish or download some of those coloring pages you like so well.
- Visit your local florist. A few roses in a vase can lift anyone's spirit and they don't cost an arm and a leg. Still too much? Choose my favorite: Carnations!
- Get an Ice Cream Sundae - Go ahead!!
Remember, the 3C's. You didn't Cause it, you can't Control it, you can't Cure it.
Find your joy today!
Oh, and these are for you =)
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