Happy New Year!
2017 is here whether we like it or not. And the song by Bob Dylan from 1964 is as relevant as ever. "The times they are a-changin". I've made a lot of personal changes in the last few months as previously shared and so I was beginning to look forward to this year with great anticipation and excitement as to what might lay ahead.
Of course, the pivotal political scene is looming large but I'm looking beyond it at my own place and my own pace and the part I play living in the here and now. Challenged a few weeks ago by a group I'm part of to come up with my personal word for this year, I pondered and noted and reasoned within to see what word would suit the year ahead. At first I was entertaining the word Discipline as it's a lifestyle I earnestly seek in many facets of my life. So I noted Discipline as a contender for this year. Another word that I played with in my dance to and fro was Freedom. I preferred the sound of Freedom over Discipline as it just had such a "spin around in circles and twirl your dress" kind of feeling for me. Sort of a feeling that I would have wings and soar wherever I wanted to go as high as I wanted or dive down at a great rate of speed, only to pull up on my own wings and soar again. Or to merely float in an ethereal type of meandering through life causing everyone to wish they were me. Truly Freedom seems the opposite of Discipline and yet you really can't have Freedom without Discipline. But all that changed last night.
A few years back I designed a website entitled Enabling Love just like this blog page. But I noticed a while back that when I went to view my pages, they were nowhere to be found. Knowing that this would take some uninterrupted time on the phone with my provider, I didn't address it until last night. "Hmmm" they said, "let's have a look see." Well, 65 minutes later (see? you need an open ended amount of time) it turns out that something disconnected from one part of the website to the other and needed to merely be corrected. It wasn't anything I would have known or would have done intentionally. We tweaked a few more things over the phone and the provider told me that my page would come back as originally designed and be up and running shortly. However, as you may have guessed, what should have happened and what actually happened are two different things. It turns out that my website will have to be redesigned and that doesn't necessarily make me happy and yet it gives me a thought of a new direction for Enabling Love. A change of sorts.
I had been contemplating making this change for some time as I began to realize that I have so much more to discuss with you then always my walk in recovery. Now, my recovery and the walk through the years of addiction within my family have certainly been a HUGE part of what shaped me but it isn't all I am. I began to feel last year that I wanted to take this blog up a little more. Breathe deeply and exhale slowly because we are so much more than what hardships have come our way. We were created for more!
Enabling has two meanings but most of our culture has come to relate it only to a negative action connected to addiction or alcohol abuse. In the negative aspect, enabling describes dysfunctional behavior and codependency patterns that makes any parent, spouse, child or sibling add another heap of guilt and shame onto their own sagging shoulders.
Enabling is also referred to in a positive manner as an action that empowers someone to soar above the clouds (wear your wings!); the ability to accomplish something that takes work to finish. When one is empowered they are confident and capable of seizing opportunities that come along. Can't isn't on the radar screen.
What a difference, eh?
So, with that being said my new word for this year is Change and along with that my website and blog will be making changes too. It will still have references and resources to assist those desperately looking for help during the crisis and chaotic situations that come with addiction and alcohol. But hopefully, it will also offer some bright outlooks, good stories and wellness to soothe your soul, too. After all, if we only wear the gas mask we are limited by the reservoir of stale air in the tanks we wear until they are empty. We need to shed those gas masks and allow the air of good living and God's Wise direction change our thinking and change our lives for the better.
Remember what they say on an air flight? Put on your own mask first then you can help others. In other words, take care of you.
"If you change the way you look at things,
the things you look at change."