Accountability

I think the hardest part of recovery for anyone is being accountable to someone else. Heck, it's the hardest part of life for most people I know. Cliff and I talked tonight and he said he's scared to take this step. I appreciate his honesty.

In my thinking I recall the years I battled accountability therefore, being anxious and actually denying information from those closest to me. I didn't want them to call me on my choices or behavior. So, if I didn't disclose it, they couldn't ask me about it. There, I sat in my chair with my arms folded. Humph! I double dog dare you to ask me something about my destructive private life!

Thank you, thank you, thank you God, for bringing me to a close group who called me out of that stinking thinking and thank you that Cliff is being honest with himself and honest with me. Steps taken that have never been tread before. It's so freeing to be honest enough with someone else that you can be held accountable. It's not always gonna be a "touchy-feely" moment. In fact, it's gonna be sticky and sometimes painful, but I don't want to go back to living my life with Walter Mitty.

No, thank you.

4 comments:

Syd said...

I've learned to be more accountable in many aspects of my life that needed some work. In many ways though, I think that I've generally been accountable over the years. Maybe my problem has been denial.

AlkySeltzer said...

Laura, I'm one of many who is happy you found your "group". Maybe they will help you out with that 'accountability' thing, which I understand--but never could understand it with my parents, of all people.

I wouldn't tell my parent sh**! Unless it was a lie. Don't forget, "We lied, when even the truth would have sufficed.." (somewhere in the Big Book).

Lou said...

I love ya, Laura.

PRAYER GIRL said...

Being accountable to others is hard enough, but the real trick is being accountable to myself.

......means I have to be really honest with myself.

But it's good for me.